My name is Tim Butler and the story I am about to tell you is true. It changed my life forever. I
now have a purpose, a goal in life, to help all my brothers and sisters, which is who you are
according to Matthew 12: 46-50, a Disciple came up to Jesus while he was teaching the
multitudes and said, "Your mother and your brothers wish to speak to you." He said, "My
mother and my brothers! Haven't I told you whoever does the will of the father the same is my
brother, my sister, and my mother!"
And what is Gods will? To have total FAITH in him and to follow his two major Commandments.
Matt. 36-40. Love God with all your heart, might, mind and soul and Love your neighbor as
yourself, on these two Commandments fall ALL the law......
I was raised by two loving and caring parents who took great care of me. I was the baby of six
children, one sister and 5 brothers.
They tried to teach me the truth about some man named Jesus, through the Mormon religion..
I could not conceive the concept of someone named Jesus being so powerful that he could
heal people with a simple prayer to some father that he could not even see. It seemed at the
time ludicrous.
I could not heal people, our walk on water, or do miraculous things, therefore, if I could not,
nobody else could.
I thought that I was all that. I honestly believed, for some idiotic reason, that everything I
thought was right and nobody was going to tell me differently.
Then one day in therapy I was on the hot seat, being picked on, and did not like it one bit. I felt
like everyone was ganging up on me.
Then one guy said, “Tim, Do you think we hate you?” I immediately said, “You mean you like
me?”
I could not believe what I had just blurted out. I thought everyone liked me but deep down in
the back of mind I was insecure and thought that I had to tell jokes and make fun of people to
get them to like me.
Then a girl said, "yea, Tim we like you but you think everything you do is right." I said, "No
shit? Really?"
I looked around and everybody was agreeing so I said. "Damn, I didn't realize I was acting like
that. No shit?
I said, "Thanks for telling me. I really appreciate it. You guys are great telling me that because I
didn't know I was being that way, I love ya." I am going to try to remember that before I open
my mouth..."
After that, I have been a better listener and it has taught me tremendously to be more receptive
to what people are trying to explain to me. I also learned that accountability is the most
important quality that we can use in our everyday lives as human beings. Not only holding
others accountable for their actions, but holding ourselves accountable for ours too.
I told my mom about accountability. I said. "You can't keep bailing people out because they will
rely on you and take advantage, never learning from their mistakes." She has learned to apply
it into her everyday life and It has saved her a tremendous amount of stress and headaches.
She held me accountable and it changed my life forever....Tough love is hard to do but must be
done!
Here’s how I found God, or how he found me….
When I was 36 years old I was thrown in jail for my third drug charge, spent 3 months of my 1
year sentence at the Hotel Davis County Jail. I was trying to remain sane while losing all that I
had worked hard for. My fiancé, Melissa, would not work because she was mad at me for being
stupid. I told her, "Well, sell everything, even my costumes, just please be there for me when I
get out, please......
She hung in there for 3 months and I finally got work release. I was free to go to work from jail.
They wouldn't give me permission to drive to work from the jail so she had to come pick me up
from Salt Lake, take me to work, take me back to jail, drop me off and do it again the next day.....
Well, stupid me, thought I’d save her the hassle, gas money, etc. by driving myself. It was the
biggest mistake of my life, or was it?
The police ran my license plate in the jail parking lot, found out I was residing there, waited for
me to break the law and arrested me again. I was devastated, severely depressed and really
pissed off now because I knew better and did it anyway....
I immediately called my Savior, my Comforter, my Mother... Dad answered the phone, which
really shocked me because mom always answered. He said, “Your mother doesn’t want to
speak to you anymore, she has had enough…" I was devastated! She had learned tough Love!
I said, “Well dad, what do I do now?“ He said, “Well son, if you want to find the truth just read
the Book of Mormon.” I said, “You know I don’t believe in God.” He said it again and I thought,
“What have I got to lose?” So I started reading it with a purpose and it started possessing me. I
could not put it down, only to eat and sleep.
My cell mates would keep bothering me to play basketball and cards, which I loved dearly, and I would
keep telling them no because I was loving reading my book of Mormon. They told me that I was going to
go insane if I kept reading it and they were right.
That late night, early morning, I was studying the dictionary, because that is where the spirit guided me,
and I came to the word excrement - the elimination of feces. I told my cell mate, who thought I was crazy
already, “Look dude, with God our bodies are so pure that we don’t have to poop or pee!!!!! He called
me a freak and I thought to myself, “Maybe I am.."
I laid down and contemplated what to do next.” All of a sudden my feet started tingling like they were
asleep but it was more of an exhilarating feeling. I started moaning, talking to myself saying, “Oh, Oh, Oh,
my Gosh, Ooh, Ahh. Then it started moving up my leg, consuming me, devouring me, cocooning me!!!
!When it finished I was completely filled with The Holy Spirit!!! I knew then that there was a God
and I yelled out, “Oh my Gosh there is a God!!!!" I started sobbing uncontrollably because all
that I had learned from childhood was now true to me. Jesus was real, and inside of me! At
that very moment I was a changed man and had to share it with the whole world...
That morning my cell buddies amazingly talked me into trying to play basketball. I tried but I
could not concentrate. I took my shirt off, laid down in the warm sun, looked up at the fencing
and cables strung across the top and started laughing uncontrollably. I laughed so hard that
my stomach was hurting.
I felt like I was so powerful that I could fly out Of there if I wanted too. Soon it was time to go
inside so I grabbed my shirt and went inside.
They said, "Hey Butler, put your shirt on and lock down for headcount. I said, “Lock
down??? I grabbed my dick and said, " Lock down on this!!!“ . My cell buddies said, “Come on
Butler, lock down or they’ll take you to Fox!” I started break dancing, spinning on my back on
top of the steel tables, falling off and laughing my ass off...
The cops came and took me to Fox and Duffy, a cop that liked me, told me, "Alright Butler,
strip down, " I said, “Oh no Duffy your not going there are you?“ He said, “Just get your
clothes off..” I started taking my clothes off and when I got to my underwear he said, "that's far
enough.” I was relieved... “Thanks Duff", I said
He put me in a holding cell where I sat on the bench and the next thing I knew the floor started
rising and I was sitting on the floor!!! I was freaking out!!! I started losing control...
They put me in suicide watch where they could monitor me behind the Plexiglas. They gave
me a blanket and a mattress. There was no toilet, no sink, no nothing for me to hurt myself on.
For 3 days I fought the evil forces of Satan and the greatness of Gods greatest Gift, his Holy
Spirit. The darkness and the light were my only possessers. One minute I was following the
light, the next minute I was following the dark, like a chess match.
When I was following the light it was like heaven. I was in the lions den with the hungry lions
and they would not eat me. In fact, I was sleeping with them. When following the darkness I
was in hell, murdering, killing, being eaten by bigger predators, living, dying, living, dying.
I must have died and been reborn a million times, I was freaking out in terror. It was a
nightmare that I will never forget!! After the 3 days, they let me out, put me in medium security
and I was fine....
My cellys were making fun of this guy who had just came into the block. He looked very
depressed... I said, "Come on guys, What would Jesus do?
I went over to him and said, "Hey bro, Are you alright? He said, "No I just tried killing myself.. I
said, "Why'd you do that? He said, "Because I caught my wife cheating on me and took a
baseball bat to her lover and almost killed him. I said, "God will forgive you." He said, "God
ain't gonna forgive me for what I have done." I said, "He's already forgiven you, you're still
alive..
We became buddys, James and I. I taught him all about the Bible. How God forgives seven
times seventy, forever, all the time. How he knows what's in our hearts, what adversary we
must face daily. How God knows who's world this is, satans....
I am still into God more than ever and all I try to think about is What Would Jesus Do in all
circumstances. I am still preaching to this day because if I save one soul, I am guaranteed a
place with God in his Holy Kingdom.
I live for God because I now know the truth and will not ever deny it. Living to serve God
brings me more happiness than anything in this world. He does expect a lot from us but he will
never give us more than we can handle.
All we have to do is follow his two commandments Matthew Chapter 22 verses 36 -40. Love
God with all your heart, might, mind and soul. The other one is like it, Love your neighbor as
you Love Yourself. On these two commandments lay all the law.d keep bothering me to play
basketball and cards, which I loved dearly, and I would keep telling them no because I was
loving reading my bo!When it finished I was completely filled with The Holy Spirit!!! I knew then
that there was a God and I yelled out, “Oh my Gosh there is a God!!!!" I started sobbing
uncontrollably because all that I had learned from childhood was now true to me. Jesus was
real, and inside of me! At that very moment I was a changed man and had to share it with the
whole world...
That morning my cell buddies amazingly talked me into trying to play basketball. I tried but I
could not concentrate. I took my shirt off, laid down in the warm sun, looked up at the fencing
and cables strung across the top and started laughing uncontrollably. I laughed so hard that
my stomach was hurting.
I felt like I was so powerful that I could fly out Of there if I wanted too. Soon it was time to go
inside so I grabbed my shirt and went inside.
They said, "Hey Butler, put your shirt on and lock down for headcount. I said, “Lock
down??? I grabbed my dick and said, " Lock down on this!!!“ . My cell buddies said, “Come on
Butler, lock down or they’ll take you to Fox!” I started break dancing, spinning on my back on
top of the steel tables, falling off and laughing my ass off...
The cops came and took me to Fox and Duffy, a cop that liked me, told me, "Alright Butler,
strip down, " I said, “Oh no Duffy your not going there are you?“ He said, “Just get your
clothes off..” I started taking my clothes off and when I got to my underwear he said, "that's far
enough.” I was relieved... “Thanks Duff", I said
He put me in a holding cell where I sat on the bench and the next thing I knew the floor started
rising and I was sitting on the floor!!! I was freaking out!!! I started losing control...
They put me in suicide watch where they could monitor me behind the Plexiglas. They gave
me a blanket and a mattress. There was no toilet, no sink, no nothing for me to hurt myself on.
For 3 days I fought the evil forces of Satan and the greatness of Gods greatest Gift, his Holy
Spirit. The darkness and the light were my only possessers. One minute I was following the
light, the next minute I was following the dark, like a chess match.
When I was following the light it was like heaven. I was in the lions den with the hungry lions
and they would not eat me. In fact, I was sleeping with them. When following the darkness I
was in hell, murdering, killing, being eaten by bigger predators, living, dying, living, dying.
I must have died and been reborn a million times, I was freaking out in terror. It was a
nightmare that I will never forget!! After the 3 days, they let me out, put me in medium security
and I was fine....
My cellys were making fun of this guy who had just came into the block. He looked very
depressed... I said, "Come on guys, What would Jesus do?
I went over to him and said, "Hey bro, Are you alright? He said, "No I just tried killing myself.. I
said, "Why'd you do that? He said, "Because I caught my wife cheating on me and took a
baseball bat to her lover and almost killed him. I said, "God will forgive you." He said, "God
ain't gonna forgive me for what I have done." I said, "He's already forgiven you, you're still
alive..
We became buddys, James and I. I taught him all about the Bible. How God forgives seven
times seventy, forever, all the time. How he knows what's in our hearts, what adversary we
must face daily. How God knows who's world this is, satans....
I am still into God more than ever and all I try to think about is What Would Jesus Do in all
circumstances. I am still preaching to this day because if I save one soul, I am guaranteed a
place with God in his Holy Kingdom.
I live for God because I now know the truth and will not ever deny it. Living to serve God
brings me more happiness than anything in this world. He does expect a lot from us but he will
never give us more than we can handle.
All we have to do is follow his two commandments Matthew Chapter 22 verses 36 -40. Love
God with all your heart, might, mind and soul. The other one is like it, Love your neighbor as
you Love Yourself. On these two commandments lay all the law.
My FINDING GOD STORY
By Tim Butler
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